Your 5-minute guide to love and money

It's hard enough managing money alone. Throw in another person and financial sparks will fly -- but these 24 tips can help.
By MSN Money staff

Thinking of marriage? Prepare to bare your financial soul. Experts agree that couples need to talk about money -- the sooner, the better.

Before you get to 'I do'
Consider a prenuptial agreement. It's not just a document detailing how to split the assets after a divorce. It can absolve you of your spouse's debts, maintain assets for children from a previous marriage, keep a family business intact and ensure that the family home stays in the family. (See "Do you need a prenup?")

• Bring up the idea of a prenup as soon as the relationship gets serious. It can help clarify each other's circumstances and goals.
• Allow at least three months before the wedding to work out the details. A valid prenup involves lawyers and full financial disclosure. (See "The prenup problem.")
• Most prenups provide that whatever property or debts you bring to the marriage will remain yours if the marriage dissolves. They also protect what you don't have yet, including property you expect to inherit.
• No state will allow you to waive child support, dictate child custody or otherwise impinge on the rights of your children.

Getting through 'I do'
With the average cost of an American wedding nearing $30,000, there's a lot to talk about. Even if your parents are paying part of the cost, you might have to let go of some dreams, including the one calling for a perfect wedding. (See "Your fantasy wedding for less cash.")

• Lay down a budget and stick to it. Write it down so there's no question.
• Pay for your priorities. Decide what's most important to you and do everything else on the cheap.
• Take half-measures. Rather than a full reception, have a desserts-only affair. Instead of a full bar, offer beer and wine.
• Do your friends and family a favor and register for gifts in multiple price ranges. Today's bridal registries include outdoor gear, jewelry, wine and home-office supplies. (See "13 thoughtful, offbeat wedding gift ideas.")
• Get married in spring or fall and enjoy the lower off-season rates. Not only will venues be less expensive, but you'll score off-season travel rates for your honeymoon.
• Don't let the honeymoon break your budget, either. Sign up with a honeymoon registry that lets guests buy portions of your honeymoon in increments. Consider a honeymoon close to home or bid on a trip in an online travel auction.

Weddings can be costly even if you're not the bride or groom. For members of the wedding party and guests, there are ways to stay within your budget.

• Give what you can afford, based on your relationship with the couple.
• For bridesmaids, the dresses alone can be a nightmare. Ask if you can rent the dress or use one you already own. (See "The bridesmaid's survival guide.")
• Creativity and thoughtfulness ultimately go further than cash. The key is to personalize the gift. (See "6 ways to cut costs on wedding gifts.")

The honeymoon's over
Money and the expectations we bring with it become sources of friction for many couples. Even if you've married your financial opposite (and many of us do), you need to find a way to financially coexist. (See "Why we fight over money.")

If you didn't have the money talk before the wedding, have it now. Get down to details when you discuss your lifestyle and your goals. (See "5 steps to wedded wallets.")

• Ask your mate about his or her financial upbringing -- and be willing to explore your own.
• Pick a good time to talk about money -- not at meals, right before bedtime or when inebriating substances are flowing.

Once you're on the same financial wavelength, figure out where your money goes. Then set some goals, such as saving for retirement, paying off debt, preparing for children or buying a house. (See "Should newlyweds buy a house?")

• Set up a budget. Even if you had one when you were single, you need a new one that includes both incomes, debts and bills. (See "Budget your way to smarter spending.")
• Decide whether to use joint or separate accounts or consider having "yours," "mine" and "ours" accounts. Experts agree that if a couple can't share their money in a checking account, it's probably a signal that something's wrong in the relationship. (See "Love, honor and a shared bank account.")
• If one of you brought debt into the marriage, it becomes a problem for both of you. Work together to figure out a plan to pay it off. But don't officially commingle your debt; keep existing credit card and loan accounts in the original holder's name. (See "Take control of your debt.")
• Update your paperwork, including wills, 401(k) beneficiaries, life insurance policies and the withholding amount on your income taxes. (See "Marriage means updating vital papers.")
• Assess your emergency fund. Every couple should have enough money to cover three to six months worth of living expenses.

Happily ever after?
Once you're cruising along on a shared plan, you'll need to pay attention to keep your financial boat afloat.

• Put yourself in each person's shoes. If one person is generally responsible for the budget and the other does the purchasing, switch roles every three to six months. This way, both partners know your financial situation.
• Don't begrudge your spouse small indulgences, but do agree to consult each other on big-ticket items. Put a dollar amount on what constitutes a big-ticket item now, so there's no question later.
• Don't keep money secrets.
• And finally, don't criticize your spouse about money in front of others. Ever.

Source: MSN